...

[vulgarweed]

I am a BAD BAD person for laughing at this as hard as I am.


Your dearly departed pet, in Bad Photoshop Heaven.

See, this is why I can't have nice things (like money). If I did, I'd be badgering them to do one of my dearly missed Marlowe taking a whizz on Jesus's robe or trying to shred the BVM's eyelids. Because he totally would. And it didn't mean he didn't like you.

Comments

[maelipstick.livejournal.com]

I'm afraid I can't do you Marlowe, but what I can do is here:

~*~

Aziraphale flopped limply into an armchair in his back room. It had been the worst fight since the second arrangement, the one that involved spending wednesday afternoons and sunday mornings increasing their carnal knowledge of each other.

Actually, it had been their worst fight since considerably before then. There hadn't been a discorporation since the middle ages, and that was the demons fault for making jokes about a Diet of Worms. Was it his fault though, thought Aziraphale mournfully, he'd only been following his ineffably apointed nature after all.

Like he supposed, Crowley was only really following his natural instincts when he suggested they See Other Beings, and then a few nervous sips of that 1957 Rioja later, expanded to the specifics, namely he'd like to see one of those air-head Incubus's rogering seven levels of damnation out of Aziraphale for his demonic viewing pleasure.

He hadn't needed to get so angry. He was rather confused by how much entering into a relationship that involved sharing carnal knowledge seemed to engender anger, or hurt or worry. It seemed rather unfair. Anyhow angry he had got, and discorporated Crowley had got and now he was here on his own with no prospect of carnal knowledge for at least the decade or so it would take Crowley to get his body back.

If then, of course. Aziraphale looked at his plump fingers hopelessly. What after all would a demon know about forgiveness?

Then he noticed it, or rather he noticed a source of light where one had not been before. He peered over, quite sure he'd never owned a photograph frame incorporating flashing lightbulbs. Then he noticed the faintly glowing scrawl:

"Angel, hope this keeps the memory alive while I'm gone."

And then he noticed
the picture

P.S. I shall be expecting payback on my return.

[vulgarweed.livejournal.com]

Ahahahahahah!!! What the hell is he doing with his TONGUE?!? XD


This rules! Hee, wednesday afternoons and Sunday mornings. They have a regular schedule, how adorable. And Crowley's such a perv. I'm SO unlocking this post and linking to this.

[maelipstick.livejournal.com]

It just had to be done. And for some reason cutting and pasting bits of our Lord was just the sort of brain numbing mechanical task my head needed last night.

What the hell is he doing with his TONGUE?!? XD

Do you want to know the horrible truth? It's not his tongue. Crowley's just been having a light snack. (I originally thought it was his tounge when I snagged the photo off the net, it was only during C&P operations I realised it is in fact a tail.) I have no idea what the significance of this is, except perhaps that Crowley is reminding the world he can dislocate his jaw and effortlessly swallow large objects.

I did, momentarily contemplate making the tail fluffy and kittenish as if to explain the disappearence of the photo's previous occupant. But fortunately the task proved beyond the capabilities of MS Paint





And Crowley's such a perv.

Well yes, but you kind of knew that.

[vulgarweed.livejournal.com]

AHAHAHAHAH a tail. I thought that didn't really look like a snake tongue. Anyway, I learned something disgusting and fascinating on one of the science channel "Super Snake" programs the other day - large snakes like pythons and anacondas and the like, when they're in the process of swallowing something big, like a goat, can take hours. So they actually can stick their windpipes out of their throats so they can breathe during the long effort. Something else to think about.



I did, momentarily contemplate making the tail fluffy and kittenish as if to explain the disappearence of the photo's previous occupant. But fortunately the task proved beyond the capabilities of MS Paint


XD

[aineotter.livejournal.com]

oh, yeah. i think they all can do that...Moebius, the corn snake I fostered did it quite nicely. Useful talent, no?

[maelipstick.livejournal.com]

Very useful talent, but then I'm guessing Crowleysnake would not need to breathe at all. Although he might do it just to show off.

[blueeyedtigress.livejournal.com]

Ah. Yes. Of course. That site is a Crowley invention.

It all makes sense now ....

[maelipstick.livejournal.com]

When I see sites like this my thoughts immediately turn to the demonic one. It strikes me as the sort of thing he'd enjoy inventing imensely.