A very very hard post for me to make

[vulgarweed]

I haven't been around much, because a week ago today, after 10 wonderful years together my dear sweet impish girl Madimi (icon photo) left me suddenly and unexpectedly.

The shock has passed for the most part and now the loneliness has set in. My friends and family have been hugely supportive, and so has my job for the most part, but I'm still barely holding it together.

Comments

[violsva]

I'm so sorry.

[vulgarweed]

Thank you.

[ancientreader]

I'm so sorry. It's a hell of a blow to lose a cherished companion at all, never mind the abruptness.

[vulgarweed]

Thank you. It was a hell of a shock to everyone - and especially hard on my housemate, who was the one who held her as she died (while on the phone with me telling me what was happening - I was at work - and hearing me crying and screaming).

The worst of the shock and horror is passing, and the grief is dulling - which I almost regret, because it signifies the time I spent with her receding ever further into the past.

She was always a trickster, and I wouldn't even completely put past it being her final prank, except I knew it took her by surprise as well and she was not ready to go.

[silverfox]

*hugs* again. She was such a beautiful girl.

I've been trying to prepare myself for the loss of my horse, whom I've had for 25 years now, for years, but I'm never sure what life without such a long time presence must feel like. Friends of mine who lost their horse suddenly some months ago found some comfort in tending mine in the morning, but I also imagine that at this point another cat might only be a reminder of your loss. So, I'm thinking of you, but I have no advice to give.

[vulgarweed]

Thank you so much! She was, she really was, and she knew it!

Cherish your horse as long as you can, that's all I can say. You can never completely prepare yourself, even if you have advance warning. No advice needed, just love and support.

There will be another cat in my life someday but you're right, I'm nowhere near ready. It was nearly 2 years after Marlowe passed in '06 before Madimi came along.

[splix]

It's so so hard to lose an animal friend. I'm sorry. She's a beautiful naughty-looking kitty. I'm glad you loved each other for ten years. <3

[vulgarweed]

Thank you. She was SUCH a trickster. Clever and demanding and she gave no fucks at all. She was the kind of cat who would stare you right in the eye as she knocked things over in cold blood. I thought she was starting to mellow with age, and in some ways she was, but part of that mellowing was the onset of the heart issues that are almost certainly what killed her. I'd suspect her of leaving me in the most trollish way possible on purpose, if I didn't know it took her by surprise as well.

10 years wasn't nearly enough, but it was certainly densely packed full of memories. She burned too short, but very brightly.

[splix]

She sounds amazing and ornery. :D

[pauraque]

I'm sorry for your loss.

[vulgarweed]

Thank you so much.

[donut_donut]

Thinking of you. Losing a cherished companion of many years is so difficult.

[vulgarweed]

Thank you. She took off with a huge chunk of my heart.

[signoftea]

I'm sorry. *hugs*

[vulgarweed]

Thank you so much dear.

[discordantwords]

I'm so sorry for your loss. <3

[vulgarweed]

Thank you! It's still a heavy load.

[resonant]

Oh, no. I’m so so sorry,

[vulgarweed]

Thank you so much!

[vivien]

I'm so very sorry for your loss, friend. Grief is hard, hard, hard.

[vulgarweed]

Thank you so much, my dear. It is an absolute shitshow. And yet we choose to take this on again and again - because ultimately when compared to what we get, it's worth it.