vulgarweed: (ringbybleu-unicorn)
Dear Tolkien Society,

I have combed all the Letters and HoME notes for this and have yet to find a definitive answer to this question; if it's in there and I missed it, please forgive me. During a sexual encounter, would the penis of the penetrator or fellatee disappear upon entering an orifice of someone wearing the One Ring? (Assuming this person is neither Sauron nor Tom Bombadil)

Sincerely,

V, who needs to know Because of Reasons, and when I tried to contact the Professor over the Ouija board, he hung up on me.


~~~

Dear Christopher Tolkien....

NOPE. You guys will have better answers anyway.




[Poll #1906920]



This is the kind of question that keeps me up at night. Perhaps I should look at my life choices.

*looks*

Yup, they're fine!
vulgarweed: (dont_try_by_cinnamonblood)
Going back through [livejournal.com profile] lower_tadfield's back pages in the tagging project made me want to go back through my own, now that I'm nearly 7 years in the Good Omens fandom. (Like angels' feathers, my own tags are not particularly well-groomed.)

So it's time for a new Headcanon/Personal Fanon post.

Here is a response to a meme I did back in 2007 about listing personal fanon/headcanon for one's OTP. So I wrote about Aziraphale and Crowley, largely little factoids about their sexuality, their relationship, and their history.

I didn't talk about their physical appearance very much, so here are two bits of my headcanon about that:

1. They are precisely the same height, exactly 6'0". I think this because of a legend that only supernatural beings in human form can be precisely 6'0", not one millimillimeter over or under. That said, Crowley often looks a little bit taller, probably because he's leaner, wears black more often, and Aziraphale slouches.

2. Although they're the same height, Aziraphale does have a slightly larger wingspan. I think this because of A Matter of Proportion by [livejournal.com profile] quantum_witch, which will never NOT be funny. Let's say Aziraphale's wingspan is about 25'1" to Crowley's 24'8". I think the average wingspan of an angel is between 23 and 26 feet, and I think that because of Argentavis magnificens, the Argentinian Teratorn. (If you have any kind of bird phobia, DO NOT click those links.) Conventional wisdom used to have it that angels can fly 'cause MAGIC, of course no feathered birdlike wings could ever get a 6' tall, 200-lb creature off the ground. Ah, but Miocene megafauna solidly challenges that notion, since A.magnificens was exactly that. And did fly. With wings about that size. (here is a scientific article on the aerodynamics involved.) Now of course angels are in no way bound by this, 'cause MAGIC, but that's just what I see in my head now.
vulgarweed: (rock)
GOE reveal yesterday!

I wrote this:
Their Satanic Majesties Request
for [livejournal.com profile] thilia
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Crowley/Aziraphale
Request: Crowley/Aziraphale, AU - or not? Crowley is a rockstar, Aziraphale is his groupie. Any rating. combined with: UST (resolved in the end), getting-together fic rather than established relationship, angst, humour, smoking, drinking, possessiveness, focus on the romance part of the story, plot AND smut, dirty talk, flirting, witty banter, dub-con, seduction, kissing, first time, manipulative bastard!Crowley (but still sweet, in his way)
Summary: Aziraphale and Crowley’s Arrangement stayed in comfortable stasis for a thousand years. It only took one decade to change it forever. (Crowley and Aziraphale do The Sixties--or do The Sixties do them?)
Warnings: Drug use and consensual sex under the influence.


I stumbled a bit over the "groupie" part, and for a long time I struggled with this story, it was all Crowley being a reluctant grumbly rock star, and Aziraphale was barely in it. Eventually, though he found his own ways in -- as he does--and I think he turned out to be very much the backbone of the tale.

This is more or less the 60s AU (sort of) I've been wanting to write for years.

I've had a few people ask me about the 60s rock jokes and references, so I'm putting some notes about that, and some fine mood-setting YouTube videos, behind a cut.

Have You Ever Been Experienced? )

More as I remember them. Feel free to ask questions.

Humbug

Dec. 14th, 2011 06:01 pm
vulgarweed: (buggre_by_dwightsredshoes)
La la la, working on two exchange fics tonight, la la la Both canon sources are comedies, as are both fics, ideally.

I don't feel funny. I am grumpy mcgrumpypants. Everything is annoying to me. The weather sucks. I am getting interrupted a lot. I desperately need a freelancing check that I have been owed for over a month that isn't here. It feels like it's been that time of the month for weeks now and I'm sick of having a gruesome murder scene in my pants. My cat still thinks knocking things over on purpose is hilarious and that's not the kind of humor that will work for me right now. Looking at funny pictures isn't helping. Maybe I should go all reverse-psychology and look at pictures of dead children or something.

HRUMPH.

NOT FUNNY.
vulgarweed: (brew_by_bisty)
I understand that this is Podfic Awareness Week - well, I hadn't heard of it, but [livejournal.com profile] fabu brought it to my attention that it exists. Go podficcers!

One thing that comes up a lot, I am told, is permission for transformative works based on other transformative works, and how helpful it can be for writers to state their policy on such things upfront. I'm going to add this to my userinfo, but I'll put it here for now too. This is the boilerplate that's currently going around, and I agree with it and put myself firmly in this category:

Anyone who would like to create any kind of transformative work (including but not limited to: podfic, art, remixes and fanfic) based on my fanfic is given blanket permission to do so. A heads-up is appreciated (but not required!) just so I can see what you've made.

No, you don't need to ask. I didn't ask any of the authors whose sandboxes I frolic in for permission, so why should I put myself above them in any way? (My ego does want to see it when you're done, though. :D)

Just in case anyone cares at this point, I've not been even the least bit prolific lately.

I am finding the Yuletide nominations/signups business even more confusing and alienating than usual this year, so I think I'll sit it out again this year, sadly. Which is fine - it's all about [livejournal.com profile] go_exchange and original fiction, baby!

How's by you all?
vulgarweed: (serpent_by_hjbender)
Yes, I know he's green in this icon. He has a diverse "wardrobe," what can I say? As promised in this post, here's a collection of DeviantArt links I made when I was thinking about this very thing just a couple weeks ago. Thanks to QW for her suggestions!

Here be links - please give the artists FB if you like )

I am in no way trying to "prove" anything about the way Crowley "really" looks with these. (He doesn't look the same in all of them by any stretch.) I AM looking to prove that this is not an idea that's unique to just one person. There are a lot of different artists here, from a lot of different time periods in the fandom. (If you know of others, please let me know.) This has been a thing for years, for many people, that's my point. I think. Maybe the point is dolphins.

Is this a conversation we could be having on [livejournal.com profile] lower_tadfield without touching off a wankstorm? I hope we could--the fandomsecrets comment thread is a better meta discussion than anything I've seen on LT for a very long time.
vulgarweed: (serpent_by_hjbender)
A Fandom Secret about Crowley's complexion

No, I didn't post this secret, nor have I commented on it at the comm, but QW can attest I've been having Lots of Thoughts about this very thing lately, partly because of the latest round of casting talk and because there is definitely a mini-trend of fanart that depicts him as an MSBoC (Man-Shaped Being of Colour) or at least Ambiguously Brown.

And I just find the whole thing so fascinating, because it ties into all sorts of possible discussions about our mental images of book characters and where they come from--book covers and illustrations are of course an obvious source, but by no means the only one.

I actually have a whole rough draft of an essay about this and a collection of links to Crowley-ain't-white fanart I've seen, but ack! I have to go to work. But I'll be back!
vulgarweed: (caronfire_by_dwightsredshoes)
TWO Good Omens secrets at Fandom Secrets today?

Crowley, what have you been up to? I know it's you, because one of them is WingWank. (Like Pavlov's dog, I had to comment in support of Team Spectacular Multicolored Plumage, now will you be nice to me and stop messing with my phone? Thank you.)
vulgarweed: (snoopy_by_roseinshadow)
Or at least it will be. Weatherman Tom Skilling called what's coming "An Edmund Fitzgerald storm." Greeaat. Well, actually, it's good writing weather.

I'm up to my elbows in the 1992 novel (with veterinary gloves on) and having a grand old time, but lots of things are irking me. One of them is the fact that this book has sat in a drawer for nearly twenty years, and in that time frame, lots of other writers have come up with some of the same plot points as me. So I'm sitting there copying this thing, thinking from time to time, "Hey, didn't something really similar happen to Harry Dresden once?" and "Isn't that also one of Sookie Stackhouse's problems?" and the like. Of course, most the things that my own book now reminds me of were written afterward. Which kind of makes me hate myself for procrastination, but since that's one of the defining aspects of my personality, I doubt that'll change. Or, y'know, maybe I'll change someday. ;)

It's also another reason never to make plagiarism charges lightly. Great minds don't have to know of each other to think alike sometimes, and the tighter the genre, the more likely it is that similar things will pop up here and there like mushrooms that have never met. Or something.
vulgarweed: (bunnyarrow_by_semyaza)
A really nice thing about holiday exchanges like Yuletide is that small(ish) book fandoms get a moment in the pale winter-solstice sun.

One thing to consider as you start to think about which fandoms you want to request and offer and power-cram and re-read is this:

Fanlore's Page on Professional Author Fanfic Policies

This page includes handy lists of Authors Who Like Us And Might Even Be Us (or at least don't throw mortifying hissy fits) and Authors Who Think Fanfiction Is Like Stealing Their Fingerprints and Molesting Their Dog.

Obviously this isn't going to be anyone's only criterion and probably shouldn't be, but I think it is worth keeping in mind, and that it's to our advantage to support the authors who support us (or at least don't insult and/or threaten us).
vulgarweed: (snoopy_by_roseinshadow)
I'm not in a mood to read SRS BSNS posts by SRS PEOPLE, but there were two entries that were VERY Relevant To My Interests.

Getting Medieval On Your Ass. It's about sex toys in pre-industrial societies and the fantasy analogues thereof. Yes, that's the best title ever for a post about that.

THE SPARRING LEADS TO SEX: A Manifest. Who loves this trope? Not me, I promise. *eyedart, fingers crossed behind back*
vulgarweed: (Default)
This whole post and its comment thread at Fandom_Wank has me shrieking with laughter harder than anything else in fandom has in MONTHS, and right now I desperately needed a good laugh like you would not believe.

AWESOME.


So I ask my f-list: if you were going to troll a fic-search community in any of your fandoms, what incredibly OTT crack-fic summary would YOU write? And would it be very possibly a real fic that really exists?

If you were going to request a fic of mine but didn't remember it very well, how cracktastic could you make the summary?

If there was a crackfic in your fandom that doesn't really exist yet (as far as you know) but you really wish it did, how would you phrase a fake search request for it?
vulgarweed: (ho_by_tearofabasilisk)
Less than 12 hours left to sign up for [livejournal.com profile] go_exchange! You know who you are *fisheyes you*

Currently we are at, ahem, 69 participants. Yup, it's the biggest yet!

Now it's time for one of those fandom philosophical questions that keep me up all night. I'm well aware of the ongoing dispute as to whether canon gay ships are actually "slash" ("slash" historically implying a subversive reading of the text). (Yes, that might mean Dumbledore/Grindelwald is no longer "slash" by some interpretations.)

What about "wingfic"? I have always taken this to refer to those fics where, say, Dean Winchester or Elijah Wood or somebody randomly wakes up with wings, or has mysteriously had them all along. A fantasy, an AU, a subversive reading or deliberate rejection of wingless reality. So can it be proper wingfic if the characters canonically do have wings? I do believe that in response to this genre, [livejournal.com profile] daegaer once wrote a fic in which Crowley and Aziraphale mysteriously no longer have them, which is probably the only way to do "wingfic" with them in that sense. (Yeah, someone asked for it. I promise I won't be that pendantic in "real fandom life," only in my LJ.)
vulgarweed: (ho_by_tearofabasilisk)
Less than 12 hours left to sign up for [livejournal.com profile] go_exchange! You know who you are *fisheyes you*

Currently we are at, ahem, 69 participants. Yup, it's the biggest yet!

Now it's time for one of those fandom philosophical questions that keep me up all night. I'm well aware of the ongoing dispute as to whether canon gay ships are actually "slash" ("slash" historically implying a subversive reading of the text). (Yes, that might mean Dumbledore/Grindelwald is no longer "slash" by some interpretations.)

What about "wingfic"? I have always taken this to refer to those fics where, say, Dean Winchester or Elijah Wood or somebody randomly wakes up with wings, or has mysteriously had them all along. A fantasy, an AU, a subversive reading or deliberate rejection of wingless reality. So can it be proper wingfic if the characters canonically do have wings? I do believe that in response to this genre, [livejournal.com profile] daegaer once wrote a fic in which Crowley and Aziraphale mysteriously no longer have them, which is probably the only way to do "wingfic" with them in that sense. (Yeah, someone asked for it. I promise I won't be that pendantic in "real fandom life," only in my LJ.)
vulgarweed: (myfandom_by_refche_art_by_linnpuzzle)
Huh, what? Did JKR just say something?


*grins*


I've skimmed a number of reaction essays, from the furious to the rapturous, and as far as I've seen, everybody seems to be missing the most important angle.

Do you realize what this means, people?



IT MEANS YOU CAN WEAR YOUR HOGWARTS COSTUME TO THE PRIDE PARADE NEXT YEAR!
vulgarweed: (myfandom_by_refche_art_by_linnpuzzle)
Huh, what? Did JKR just say something?


*grins*


I've skimmed a number of reaction essays, from the furious to the rapturous, and as far as I've seen, everybody seems to be missing the most important angle.

Do you realize what this means, people?



IT MEANS YOU CAN WEAR YOUR HOGWARTS COSTUME TO THE PRIDE PARADE NEXT YEAR!
vulgarweed: (porn!)
Now, I have a love/hate/meh relationship with [livejournal.com profile] fanficrants. For every funny and right-on rant over there, there's a whole lotta dumb. And my least favorite flavor of dumb is that of giggly, prudish little girls (of any age or gender) who shudder at the word "cock" and think that teh pr0n ought to be vague and Victorian (or worse yet, always realistic) and are so literal-minded that metaphor or simile usually escapes them. There's a fair amount of that too.

But today [livejournal.com profile] firefly99's posted a great thread: What does work in porn? Post your favorite examples and discuss!

([livejournal.com profile] use_theforce_em, I used one of yours, take a bow.)

What I'm really hoping is that the examples will be so diverse it'll help people realize that there is nothing more subjective in fiction than 'what is hot'--unless it's 'what is funny'--and for someone whose favorite genre is erotic comedy, this is close to my heart and my buttons get pushed a lot.
vulgarweed: (porn!)
Now, I have a love/hate/meh relationship with [livejournal.com profile] fanficrants. For every funny and right-on rant over there, there's a whole lotta dumb. And my least favorite flavor of dumb is that of giggly, prudish little girls (of any age or gender) who shudder at the word "cock" and think that teh pr0n ought to be vague and Victorian (or worse yet, always realistic) and are so literal-minded that metaphor or simile usually escapes them. There's a fair amount of that too.

But today [livejournal.com profile] firefly99's posted a great thread: What does work in porn? Post your favorite examples and discuss!

([livejournal.com profile] use_theforce_em, I used one of yours, take a bow.)

What I'm really hoping is that the examples will be so diverse it'll help people realize that there is nothing more subjective in fiction than 'what is hot'--unless it's 'what is funny'--and for someone whose favorite genre is erotic comedy, this is close to my heart and my buttons get pushed a lot.
vulgarweed: (snoopy_by_roseinshadow)
It's still music festival season, so I've hard hardly any quality time to spend with the new addition to the household. It doesn't even have a name or a wallpaper pic yet.

So I'll do a meme. (I've been tagged for another great one; I'll do that later.) This one I ganked from a bunch of people on the f-list.

1. Comment to this post with the name of a character that I have written in fic or RP.
2. I will comment telling you the following:

a. What initially prompted me to like the character enough to write about him/her.
b. One of his/her best traits.
c. One of his/her worst traits.
d. How easy/difficult I find it to write the character.
e. The story/chapter/paragraph/phrase where I feel that I truly captured the character.
f. My plans (if any) to write the character in the near future.

And/or: Ask me anything fandom-related, and I will probably answer honestly.
vulgarweed: (snoopy_by_roseinshadow)
It's still music festival season, so I've hard hardly any quality time to spend with the new addition to the household. It doesn't even have a name or a wallpaper pic yet.

So I'll do a meme. (I've been tagged for another great one; I'll do that later.) This one I ganked from a bunch of people on the f-list.

1. Comment to this post with the name of a character that I have written in fic or RP.
2. I will comment telling you the following:

a. What initially prompted me to like the character enough to write about him/her.
b. One of his/her best traits.
c. One of his/her worst traits.
d. How easy/difficult I find it to write the character.
e. The story/chapter/paragraph/phrase where I feel that I truly captured the character.
f. My plans (if any) to write the character in the near future.

And/or: Ask me anything fandom-related, and I will probably answer honestly.

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