The Curious Incident of the Doggerel in the Nighttime

[vulgarweed]

So the #221BeMine hashtag on Twitter inspired me to generate some god-awful Sherlock Holmes-inspired verse. Since things get lost on Twitter I'm compiling them all here.

Fishes love water
Witches love pentacles
The Lion's Mane nearly
Got Holmes in its tentacles



1. Roses are red
Violet's hair was chestnut
Try to lie to Sherlock Holmes?
Really you bestnot

2. Fishes love water
Witches love pentacles
The Lion's Mane nearly
Got Holmes in its tentacles

3. Some boxes have diseased needles
Some have severed ears
Valentines' gifts at 221B
Cause justifiable fears

4. Into lawbreakers' hearts
Sherlock Holmes' name strikes fright
Though he'll let you go free
If he thinks you were right

5. Tigers have stripes
And leopards have spots on
It's a natural law
like Holmes has his Watson

6. Between hate and love
The line's thin, it is true
Moriarty to Holmes:
"I'm Reichenbach falling for you."

7. A lifelong predeliction
Can begin in a hurry
Basil, Dawson, and Ratigan
Turned a lot of kids furry

8. Holmes and Watson in the closet?
There isn't any room
Already full of schemers, cheaters,
and Russian Nihilists of doom

Comments

[stonepicnicking_okapi]

These are wonderful!

[vulgarweed]

Awww, thanks! :D

[chriscalledmesweetie]

Brilliant! 😄

[vulgarweed]

Thank you!!

[icarus]

Well, I like them, and they're clever.

[vulgarweed]

Aww, thanks so much! They were ridiculously fun to write.

[donut_donut]

Very cute! 1,2, and 3 made me smile especially.

[vulgarweed]

Heee, thank you so much! Once I got started, I couldn't stop til I was done.