The Middle Distance

ME: "Oh, I know what I'd like to watch again! Remember that really funny movie we watched...where the overzealous policeman gets assigned to that weird little small town..."
MOM: "Oh yeah, that was funny...and he gets burned, right?"
ME: "Wait...what?"

And that's the story of how I realized that Hot Fuzz and The Wicker Man have basically the same plot, and my mom thought both of them were hilarious.

So I was able to wish my mom a Happy Birthday in Portuguese today!

We got to talking and reminiscing about our trip there in '04 and she reminded me of a lot of funny moments. My favorite one I had forgotten:


Your Family Might Be Brazilian If...

...you've ever been scolded by an elderly aunt because your bathing suit covers up too much.

Reza's, of course. Cooking is for...well, for people who aren't us. (Though Greg DID make an awesome chicken paprikash from his old family recipe straight from Romania for the two of us last night).


Weird Aunt Vulgarweed says: if giving a copy of the Rosemary Sutcliff kids' adaptation of the Odyssey (with the Alan Lee illustrations) to a four-year-old is wrong, I don't wanna be right.


We have a new coffeemaker. There's a lot of chrome on it. It looks like it should have an odometer. We gave our ten-year-old, leaky, wheezy old one a back-alley burial with honor. ("Well done, thou good and faithful servant.")

I have sleek new boots (size 6 - either this vanity sizing thing is getting out of hand or my feet are shrinking. They've always been small, but that's ridiculous), new pajamas, and olive-green velvet jeans. Greg has his History of the Persian Empire book, the LOST Season 1 set, Revenge of the Sith, and cologne. We both have a beautiful Balinese calendar that my mom was sure to let us know she bought on the day of that latest bombing not very far away.

Oh, and my dad, master of the useless but hihgly entertaining gifts, has discovered the joys of the Noble Collection. Mom now has a replica of Harry Potter's wand. I have a votive candle holder that's a replica of the top of Gandalf the Grey's staff.

And to all a good night! (And Happy Hanukkah to thems that celebrates it).

Now I have to do my pinch-hitting duty for go_exchange. Because nothing says Christmas like demon/angel pr0n. (Eat THAT, Bill O'Reilly!)